My Life Balancing Blog

30Day Weight Gaining Challenge

By January 17, 2017 Everyday life

As many of my followers know. I face the challenge of being naturally skinny(wonderful…right????) Well for me, it has been a life long challenge. When I am stressed I lose weight, and when I lose weight, putting it back on is near impossible.

I have made the decision, that TODAY is my Day.1 of The weight gain challenge. For many of you, I know this  seems ridiculous, and unheard of, but for the small percentage of us who struggle with gaining weight. This blog is for you!

Since I find it extremely rare to find a “really good” weight gaining diet plan, I have created my own (with lots of research of course). My challenge will be a 30 day challenge, which “fingers crossed” will transform into my lifestyle.

END GOAL is to gain 8-10lbs within the 30 day challenge. I will post updates daily on My food plan, exercises, lifestyle change, and pictures of progress.  For all of you out there in the same circle as me, I hope you enjoy, and can transform your lifestyle and body with me. If you know someone who can benefit from my 30 Day challenge, please forward the blog. Let’s Help EACHOTHER.

DAY: 1

Starting Weight: 90lbs

Height: 5ft 1

For my weight and height I need about 1800 calories a day to maintain my weight (use a calorie calculator to find your results.)

For weight Gain: I need to increase my calories to 2,400 a day (but lets not just calorie count, we want this to be healthy with protein and proper food too)

MEALS:

Breakfast: yogurt with granola. homemade carrot, pumpkin and chocolate chip muffin, homemade protein bars (780 calories without the muffin)

( homemade protein bars contain 600calories for 2×2 square. I made them to increase my calorie intake by 1200 a day with 2 bars Easy-Peezy High Calorie Survival Bars – 3 ) I changed the recipe slightly by adding vegan -pea protein, hemp hearts, and white chocolate chunks)

Snack: almonds, bannana

Lunch: Greek Pasta with chick peas

Snack: Homemade protein bar (600 calories)

Supper: Chicken, and sweet potato fries.

Snack: creamy havarti cheese with wheat thin crackers

EXERCISE:

we are going to start TODAY off easy just 2 sets of squats and lunges ( 10 in a set) just to get our muscles motivated, and get the muscle memory there for tomorrow.

We don’t want to shock our bodies to much today with all the changes. Let that food feed and nourish our bodies today!

My DAY 1 Body Picture

As Day ONE  winds to an end. BE PROUD of yourself, feel confident. You will not see results today. but you will feel GREAT from the increased calorie and protein intake (and think of all those added vitamins), also that little bit of squats and lunges should give your body a little boost.

Now’s a great time to start thinking of tomorrow. Why not pack your lunch and snack for work tomorrow.

A nice turkey sandwich, with creamy havarti cheese, almonds, a yogurt and  a banana, and don’t forget your survival PROTEIN BARS

Hope you all enjoyed, and see you TOMORROW

 

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When do we start making decisions for US?

By January 16, 2017 Being Mom, Everyday life, health

One of the most taxing situations an individual can encounter is ridicule from within their own family circle. The feeling of being over analyzed and harshly judged from the ones we hold dearest to us is enough to send our bodies into mental distress.

The “need” to please our parents (or think we should) is programmed into our heads as a young child. Wanting to score that goal to make them proud, getting an “A” on that spelling test, to run home and earn satisfaction from the ones we cherish. These little acts are imprinted onto us and brought into our everyday adulthood.

But when do we start directing our lives for us?

It was the year I had my son, I became conscious of the whole situation. I have become a responsible adult, fully capable of making appropriate, and healthy decisions for my families future. However, I could not do it without my family’s ridicule. It seemed the littlest decision I would make would be accompanied with a phone call, and a million reasons why it is wrong and why I should change it to their desire. I changed every aspect of my life, my parenting, my social life, my employment. All of this to cater to my families need and reasoning how my life should be ran; hoping deep down they would look at me with satisfaction and respect my inner child longed for. Most of the decisions I made to please and satisfy their needs would completely turn my world upside down. It made things more difficult than need be, running around like a headless chicken bending to everyone’s whim. I became stressed, run down, lost 20lbs (when I was too skinny already), my life became a hectic and chaotic mess. Was it all worth the trials and tribulations just to have that feeling of approval?

 

The approval never came, it was a constant judgement on every aspect and detail of my life. 6 months ago, I finally came to the conclusion, this life is for me and my son. It is ours and ours only. Things started to change. I had to distance myself from my family, make decisions without approval, and do what was best for us. Life got easier, the running around lessened, my stress decreased, and my weight… well I’m still working on that one.

It was the hardest, and still one of the most difficult decisions to make. My heart wants their support and approval, but my brain knows the best for us. The urge to please our family, is stuck in our emotional upbringing, even when it comes with criticism and disapproval. My advice to everyone experiencing this: distance yourself, make your own decision without making that phone call, or text message. Choose the life that makes it easier, less stress, and most importantly happier…and see how things transform for the better.

Family is a wonderful part of everyone’s life, don’t get me wrong, but at the end of the day what you make of this world is up to you and YOU alone.

 

 

 

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Reality of owning a small business

By January 12, 2017 entrepreneur, Everyday life, success

The idea of being your own boss, for most people is a dream. The ability to making your own hours, not answering to the higher ups, to run and live what you love. This is an all amazing concept, but…

What is the reality of Owning and running a small business?

1 Making your own hours- Yes, business owners do have the ability to make their own hours, schedules, and take holiday’s when they wish, does this happen? Sure it happens, by making our days 14 hours long, working during supper on the smart phone, showing up before and leaving after everyone. Holidays, may sometimes happen, but are often swept aside, Depending on how new the company is. That dream of short hours and large paychecks may not be the case.

2.Not Answering to a boss– To many, having to answer to the boss, is dreadful. Being your own boss is a dream in many people’s eyes. However, You are left with problem solving, payroll, marketing, leads, taxes, hiring and firing, balancing, the list goes on and on.

3. Mental and emotional hard times– Every entrepreneurs journey is a road with hills, curves, and forks. Often faced with numerous high and low moments,  depending on the decisions made during these low’s, success can feel almost impossible, leaving you left anxious and depressed. As motivation and drive are key factors to defeat the low’s, they often leave you facing a mental health and depression battle. Many highly successful entrepreneurs, have faced depression and suicidal thoughts in the early business years.

The dream of building an empire, and scrapping the employee card, may just be that to many….A DREAM. Unfortunately, many entrepreneurs start out with dreams, motivation, and strive to be successful, soon to be overwhelmed with hills and forks. Being a small business owner is not a career for everyone. It takes drive, motivation, stubbornness, fighting through mental health break downs, and much more to be successful.

  You’re going to feel overwhelmed and stressed at times, But if you have drive, motivation, fight, and stubbornness you will make it.

The key to success? Setting achievable goals and following through. Stay strong and your dream comfortable living is on the horizon.

 

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The importance of taking care of YOU.

By January 10, 2017 Being Mom, entrepreneur, Everyday life, health, success

Finding yourself run down all the time. Making yourself have energy to get to that sports game, to get groceries, or read that bedtime story. Working your butt off at your career, to come home and work your butt of at parenting.

Are we being the best we can be, by being completely run down, and running off fumes?

I find myself in this position, all to often. I want to be the best in my career, at parenting, and life. Putting all my energy into these categories, to find myself completely run down, exhausted, sick and making trips to the doctors. In reality. I am not being the best at my career, parenting or life. I am running around as a zombie. Forgetting things, getting upset at my son for not picking up lego, forgetting to make time with friends.

Its easy to get caught up in the moment, and live the fast life. We need to take a step back and care about our mental and physical health. Take that time for a coffee date, for a yoga session, and making good meals. These simple things we forget about, are actual the key ingredients to being great at your career, parenting and life.

When we feel good about our mental and physical state, It gives us the drive to succeed, the energy to continue on, the feeling of well being. It keeps us from burn outs and break downs.

YOUR HEALTH MATTERS

 

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How YOGA saved me from a BREAK DOWN!

By January 9, 2017 Being Mom, entrepreneur, Everyday life, health, success

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I am not extremely flexible. I am not 100% laid back all the time, I still get stress and anxiety on a regular basis.

So how did yoga change my daily stress? If I’m still experiencing it?

Yoga shows you ways of coping and managing your anxiety. recognizing what it is, and using techniques to lower  your bodies anxious reaction to the situation. Yoga will not take away the stressful situations, but it will give you the knowledge to control your bodies reaction to it.

2 years ago, At my sons art class, watching him through the glass as he splashed paint all over the place. I found myself gasping for air, my throat felt life I just had a severe allergic reaction and it was closing. My chest began to feel like it was collapsing. Looking at the other parents, I was waiting for their facial reactions. Thinking I probably looked like I was going to kick the bucket. I rushed to the bathroom to look at my face, nope not swollen. I called my friend, and made him meet me at my apartment in case I needed to go to the hospital. I was definitely having a heart attack….or so I thought. Toughing it out that night, not going to the hospital. I came to realize. Oh my god that is what an anxiety attack is.

From that point, I started experiencing numerous anxiety attacks a week. It was unbearable. They would happen at the oddest times. Driving to work, with music on and no traffic. Right before bedtime. I felt like I was losing control of every situation. Life wasn’t fun anymore. It was constant fear of these horrible attacks. Simple decisions became stressful. Something needed to change. I was headed for a serious BREAK DOWN

I STARTED WATCHING YOGA VIDEOS AT NIGHT AND IN THE MORNING

After research, and recommendations. I chose to start the yoga practice. I started with watching videos on Youtube. I would put my son to bed, make a tea, lay my mat on the floor with my laptop, and watch decreased anxiety videos. The first few nights, I noticed a bit of a difference. I could feel the stretches, and it was relaxing but was not decreasing my anxiety levels.

“This isn’t helping, I don’t need to get more flexible, I need to help my anxiety” angrily venting to a friend. I remember him saying. ” Sarah, you are not listening to your body. You are doing it only for the poses. Look past that, concentrate on your breath, and become one with your body”

I decided to keep trying, I mean what’s the harm. That night, I grabbed my Mat and tea, tuned in to YouTube. Really trying to focus on my breath. During that practice something changed. I remember like it was 2 minutes ago. It is like I could hear everything in my body. I lived in a high rise on a main street, and the traffic and sirens disappeared. Each pose , my breath took me into a deeper stretch and mental relaxation. I finished the video, grabbed my tea, and headed to the balcony. I was in complete ZEN. My mind was so clear, I don’t even think, I could remember my stresses at that point. All my visions and life seemed to make sense, and positive vibes were glowing from me.

The next morning I woke up an hour before my son, to do morning yoga “THIS IS IT, THIS IS MY ANXIETY MEDICATION” I practiced religiously every night and every morning. Each video bringing me into a better mind state.  The mornings I would feel energized for the day. Knowing that when stress appeared, i could handle it. The nights I would feel relaxed and free.

YOGA DOES NOT CURE ANXIETY, IT GIVES YOU THE TECHNIQUES TO CONTROL IT

Now I am not saying, my anxiety is completely gone, and that I no longer have any stress in my life.  Believe me with a business to run, a 5 year old son, 2 dogs and sports to attend life gets crazy. But yoga gave me the techniques to use when in those stressed situations, I can cope. It lets me connect with my body, to control my break downs and attacks.

Now as many think yoga is only for exercise, and you have to be flexible. YOU ARE WRONG!

For me yoga took me on a road to recovery from a BREAK DOWN.

“It’s not about touching my toes. Its about what i learned on the way down”

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Tips to Dating a Single Parent

By January 8, 2017 Being Mom, Everyday life

Dating a single parent has many up and downs, and is not the traditional dating you may be expecting. It is actually the complete opposite, like living on a whole different planet, and having to adapt to a new and ever changing atmospheric pressures, oxygen levels and lifestyles.  This new planet, is not a horrible or terrifying planet, but completely different from the planet we have grown so familar with.

People who make the decision and choose to date a single parent need to know, and be prepared for this new way of living.

  1. GOING ON DATES IS A CHALLENGE:

Going on random romantic dates, probably is not in the cards. ( unless the little one is involved of course) Things need to be planned well in advance, with the expectation, that plans may get cancelled due to last minute emergencies. That being said, you need to step up the game with these dates. Very rarely do we get to go out and have an alone night. So when we do, we like it planned and romantic. It doesn’t have to be expensive, but the surprise of even babysitting arrangements is huge points to us.  The dates will be amazing and  highly appreciated, because deep down we wish to spend more time alone with you.

2. LIFE IS BUSY- IF YOU CANT HELP…GET OUT ( a little harsh, but true)

As a single parent our daily routine consists of rushed wake ups, forced breakfasts, clothes battles, rushing to school, long work days, pick ups, sports, dinner, bedtime stories, back rubs, and mending break downs. If you cant handle the little time we have during the week day to devote right to you, this probably isn’t the right fit. The way we spend time with you is , we need you to help out, help us with supper, with mending break downs, with down time after bed. Believe me, to single parents helping us with the little things, is the most amazing and a great way to win our heart. Just recently I was reading my son a bedtime story and the man I am dating came in and listened to be part of family time. This completely melts a single parents heart, knowing someone is devoted to you and your child, without being the biological parent.

3.TRULY CARE ABOUT THEIR CHILD

We all know, our little one, is the top priority. We want someone who understands that, and will make it their top priority to. Fake-ness is spotted quickly. You need to understand most of our time is devoted to our children, so be part of that time.You need to take the child on as one of your own, and that can be a very scary concept. But if you are in it for the long run, making them your family is a must.

4. WE ALWAYS HAVE OUR GUARD UP

This is a habit we can not turn off. Even when the relationship is perfect,their is a voice in our head saying “he/she is going to hurt us”. We are sorry. Our children are number one, and always will be. We protect them from monsters in the closet, bullies at school, so we need to protect them from potential heart ache. Please don’t take this personally. We are not trying to drive you away, or be distant. We just have our protective gear up. When you see the shield in action, show us a little extra love that day, give us a hug and say you care..that’s all we need.

5.NO GAMES ALLOWED

There is no time or tolerance for games. Our lives are so jammed with sports, parent meetings, and careers, we don’t have time for this garbage.  If you have any of those tricks up your sleeve, best not to get involved in the first place. Like listed before WE HAVE OUR GUARD UP. So even if it looks like a game may come into play, your potential of lasting is slim to none. Make it clear to us by actions and vocal that no games will played.

6. WE ARE THE BEST

With all those tips, that can be scary and intimidating. But we make amazing companions.

We don’t want drama- We have enough chaos going on in our heads and lives, we probably can’t handle anymore. “keep that shit , far far away”.

We love unconditionally- If you show your potential, we will give you everything we have. We know how,we have already loved unconditionally since the positive pregnancy sign. We understand selflessness.

Sex will be great. We know what we like and want, we know how to cuddle, and the times to actually ‘make love’ are slim, so it needs to be 100% fulfilling.

Debating on switching planets, here is your survival kit. Let it be the best adventure of all time.

 

 

 

 

 

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why is skinny shaming OK?

By January 6, 2017 Being Mom, Everyday life, health

“Skinny”, “anorexic”, “body of a 12 year old boy” are just a few of the comments I have received from society. My whole life I have been“blessed” as some would say, with being extra skinny. Chances of me having curves, or to look like a ‘woman’ are just not in my genetic makeup. I balance between a size 0 to 1 pant size, and always buy extra small shirts. Weight gain diets are usually  new year and summer resolutions for me. Where I consume as much protein and calories as possible, Never ever seeing any results. The only weight gain I was blessed with, was when I was pregnant and gained 50lbs, which disappeared days after birth of my son. Lucky boy has been blessed with my genes…

Every family event I attend I hear ” go eat something, you are way to skinny”. Getting reminded constantly to eat from friends.  Just last week I was faced with a social shaming. ” are you ok?, you are clearly not takingcare of yourself. You need to start eating, and definitely stop wearing black, it makes you look way to thin”…..what do you say to this? I grin and bear it. while cursing them up and down in my head.

SO why is Skinny Shaming OK?

We see it everyday, From magazines, news, social media, and in our own reality. People getting criticized for not having curves, or not being above a size 7. Social media post consist of “guys want something to hold on to, not a stick” Why is this OK? Is this not as bad as calling someone with curves fat? overweight? or to eat less calories?

I remember walking through a small town fair, with a past boyfriend. In small towns everyone knows everyone, So clearly the friend that walked up to us, knew I have always been skinny, and am not just starving myself. The friend told my boyfriend at the time ” How do you sleep with her, it would be like sleeping with a 12 year old boy” Well thank you, for making me feel GREAT about myself. For weeks after I looked in the mirror wishing I could just gain 10lbs, going out in public was anxiety filled. The comments were just so overwhelming. Feeling ashamed, ugly, and not up to standards are just some of the horrible thoughts skinny shaming causes.

SO let me ask you this.

Would you call someone overweight? Fat? or tell them to stop eating so much?

Absolutely not. That is inappropriate, morally wrong, and clearly rude.  There is numerous of reasons why someone may give the image of being overweight. Body type, health reasons, stress to name a few. So is being skinny any different? are we not allowed to have a thin body type without being anorexic, and on top of it shamed for, all because we don’t match the other 90% of the population.

For some reason society has come to the conclusion If you are skinny, it must be intentional, and making it known to us, is acceptable. In reality we are just as self conscious as any other human being. Finding imperfections about our bodies.

All shaming is wrong race, weight, disability, or any other difference. We as a society need to take this into consideration, and accept and understand everyone is and should be different. How boring would the world be if EVERYONE WAS THE SAME!

 

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Why entrepreneur’s need entrepreneur friends.

By January 4, 2017 entrepreneur, Everyday life, success

As I find myself curled up on my kitchen floor after a long and unsuccesSfull work day. Rethinking all the mistakes I have made in my business. The clients I should I have responded to earlier, the large purchases I made that were impacting my financial security. The relationships I held onto that were negatively affecting my business. All the advice I had received from outsiders on how to run my business.

How could I get to this point. The most unsettling feeling, of watching your dreams and life crush before you. Continuing to dwell  “I have tried all the advice from friends, on running a successful business”

“Why, am I still failing?”

Still positioned in my breakdown position, My phone rings. I answer it with a tone, only a close friend can recognize. I continue my breakdown to Rishi ( Another entrepreneur).  To my surprise  the most amazing, inspiring advice, broke me from my horrible and miserable state.

” why are you taking advice, from people who have never been in your position?”

Holy HELL!!….he is 100% right. How could I be taking advice, and running my business, on advice from people who have never owned and operated their own business.  What a BIG mistake..But what a HUGE BREAKTHROUGH.

I realized, the mistakes I have made ( clearly not all of them) were based on friends opinions, what they believed would make a success. Friends who work for employers, go to work, and leave their work far far away from home.  Friends who don’t know or understand all the extra work involved in the advice. The paper work, bills, payroll. etc…etc.. Let me add in I love my friends and family dearly, I respect their love for giving me advice. In reality some of it is just not realistic for my situation.

The importance of me sharing my experience and breakdown to all you entrepreneur’s curled up in misery and over thinking on the kitchen floor.

BUILD A STRONG SOCIAL NETWORK OF ENTREPRENEUR FRIENDS

People who probably will not be running the same business plan as you, but will be venturing through the same paperwork, climbing the same mountains, sharing similar achievements. Think of all that you have learned on your journey. How much advice could you give?…….

So why not take advice from someone that has finished climbing the mountain,  that you are packed and stumbling on.

Building face to face relationship’s with other entrepreneur’s is the most ideal, giving you the opportunity to escape the office during a break down to meet for coffee, but online networking and groups are of large importance to.

I have attached a few links, of must join groups. The first link is from Forbes, a book I highly suggest downloading th APP for. It has giving me advice, support, and motivation. The link will give you names of organizations to join.

http://www.forbes.com/sites/johnhall/2012/10/09/the-best-organizations-for-entrepreneurs/#5651524474d8

This link is the top 16  linkedin social networks that every entrepreneur should be a part of . http://www.businessnewsdaily.com/7185-entrepreneur-linkedin-groups.html

 

GET OUT THERE…be the SUCCESS you can be..

STOP taking advice from by-standers,

  JOIN an entrepreneur social network group.

 

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Career or Parenting? Why choose

By January 3, 2017 Being Mom, Everyday life, success

 

So it comes to the question Career? or Parenting?

but why choose one?

Showing dedication and pride in your career, is a huge stepping stone for your child. Not only does it show them work ethic, but it shows them the will to succeed in their passions.

Starting my company I was constantly faced with the questions ” doesn’t your son come first?” “or Now you have no time for your son, you will regret this.” In reality, it was the best step I made.  My son loves being involved in the company, He talks about his passions more, and amazing life lessons are being taught

The number one  tip I can give as a career/ single mom  is involve your kids in the business. This will give them drive and excitement about the business, You will build memories, and most of all. You will be giving the most valuable lesson of all. Showing your child dreams can come true.

So is Parenting? Or Career? A question

 

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Negative people Do affect SUCCESS

By January 1, 2017 Everyday life, success

Find yourself surrounded by negative people?
Don’t think it affects your success?

Negativity has a way of soaking into your thoughts. A way that every decision you make about your future, becomes consumed with ;
” Am I making the right decision”
“Am I doing the wrong thing”
” Should I even be doing this”

Eventually all your drive, dreams and energy get surrounded by this darkness. Which makes every decision feel like the wrong one, or that you are not built to be a business owner.

When I envisioned my dream of opening a massage/yoga clinic, I remember the excitement in me. I had so many dreams and visions, nothing could stop me. I woke up each morning glowing, ready and extremely excited for the day ahead of me.

 

How did this change?

I allowed toxic friends, and relationships into my life. I started finding every move and decision I made for my business, was quickly shut down, second guessed, and criticized. I went home completely exhausted. I got to the point where my work suffered, I was not putting in the extra effort to make my business successful. I had no idea, why I would put myself through all this extra work, when I could of just worked for someone else, and let them do the labor.

This is exactly what toxic people do, and want. Whether it is in the conscience or sub-conscience state. The negativity eventually wears on your drive and will for success, eventually putting your business on the back burner, or not the number one priority.

Are you willing to let your dreams fail, for these negative influences?
Because at the end of the day. This is YOUR life and DREAMS, not theirs. It will not affect your friends ( or whoever the influence may be) lives. This black hole is not worth hanging out around, it will eventually expand and consume you.

I am not saying that you will not have hard days. or days that you feel like you want to quit. But I can guarantee those days will be far less.

Start today, deplete the negativity. FIND YOUR SUCCESS, FIND YOUR HAPPINESS. wake up each morning with the glow and motivation to make a difference in your world.

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